Fela!
Ok, this is a first draft & very rough, but I guess I gotta come with some kinda praise poem...
Fela!
They don't realise
yet,
but one day, prisoners all over the world will
tell yr tale,
greater than the Signifying Monkey,
they will roll out rhapsodies
& rollicking
hip]hop ballads
to yr forked tongue
& cunning design,
he who carries death in his pocket/
who hides smoke in his shit/
who lifts millions in his underpants/
Fela!
Spliff like a log, yr head in a cloud
ancestors hang around yr shoulders
like smoke,
white agbada of aso oke.
No animal wears that skin
Akuba (Oranyon)
Oh egungun in straw mask expanding infinite heads,
terrifying liars & cheats & snakes & crocodiles,
animals in human skin
with their swiss bank billions infamy
they got it infamy
they think
one touch can kill your billions
just like that just like that just like that
Run from Fela run!
Akuba (Oranyon)
Ride the organ under your fingers preaches truth
Yr sax blurts & farts & screeches truth.
The buzz saw zzzzzzzzzz in yr throat tears lies from the air
& teaches truth.
Phat & fresh green smoking truth.
No animals in yr skin.
Sweat balls your forehead as you spin & stamp the demons
in their limousines.
Never tire of baiting words
Yab dem Fela yab dem
Never sell out!
Never a saint!
What use to people
a man without sin?
Better yr flawed arrogance
the flayed beauty of truth,
a dirty concrete block hewn into a staff of Oranyan,
a purple plastic cup with yr face stencilled black
president,
expensive stench,
a night of sweat & rain, this man gave up the funk
every night
for 30 years
Akuba (Oranyan)
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Comments
Signifying Monkey
well Fela... any praising of the Signifying Monkey is good with me.
I think Pete described the structure of the poem well, with a bit of tuning up going on - but yeah - you'll already confessed its a first draft. There are a handful of lines that with a few re-reads you might find excess to what is really workin- I think this is what gives the reader a sense that the poem is still undergoing some fitness.
Liked the way the smoke is working in the lines
'hides smoke in his shit'-
'ancestors hang around yr shoulders like smoke' -
'phat & green smoking truth' - That is a serious fav!!!!
I felt something important was going on with the repititions of: Never sell out! Never a saint! and definately in a purple plastic cup. I'm looking forward to readin the final (abandoned) draft. =)
Fela poem
OK, spliff in mouth I attempt my comments! :
The poem starts relatively quietly,a nd the layout, perhaps due to the blog forced shaping is a little scattered/ unstructured, like someone searching for the right key or pitch before starting the music, like a warm up.
The 'he who' I recognise as Yoruba praise poetry structure and I love the modernisation of the addresses! Though not sure how well it adhers to the preceding lines.
The my favourite line: 'ancestors hang around your shoulders like smoke' - love it!
I did research on Egungun so I am with you on that verse, though think the following verse more dramatic and better structured for the page at least.
My favourite verse is the one containing the line 'what use to the people a man without sin?' perhaps this should be every mavericks anthem? - I feel you're really flying there. The last verse is a cooling, a contexting.
So I would begin at 'Spliff' and end at 'President.' I'd love to see you perform it - the music you would bring to it, the control of pace etc...